Not every partner will understand the sexual preference of other. To understand the needs of a Queer could be confusing for the partner but it is not impossible.
By a study published in The Journal of Sex Research, it states that the Bisexual and Queer face more depression and anxiety than that of a Lesbian, Gay or Heterosexual. While understanding the read, it shows that the bisexual people were mostly considered either with either Lesbian and Gay or along with the Heterosexuals.
For a Queer, it is hard to explain their partner on how they feel as it is not easy on themselves.
Here are a few stories that were shared with us.
Disclaimer: Names changed for security reasons.
Advaith:
I am gay but I have not come out to my entire family yet. I explained my feelings to my wife after 5 years of our marriage. I never gained up the courage to tell her but I had to tell her because she was planning to start a family with me. When I told her about me being gay, she took it really well and asked if I wanted a divorce. It would have been hard for her to live with me after knowing about my gender preference. She simply said that she is ready to accept me the way I am and would not tell the family if I wish it to be secretive. We have a child and we are married for 8 years. I go out on a few dates with men but I return to her knowing that I love her and she loves me no matter what.
Jasmine:
I am a Bisexual. My live-in boyfriend knows that. He knew about me when we started dating. We turned out to be really good friends and eventually moved in together when we thought that was the next best thing to do for us. He gave in a word to me telling that if at any point of time I feel to have a relationship with any other he would be understanding enough to let me go. I have been with him for a good 4 years now.
Chandini:
I am a Queer. I have explained it to my family before my wedding was arranged with a man. When they informed the groom about this, my parents said that he simply said that it was just an illusion of me and he still wanted to get married to me. After a week of the wedding I told him that I was gender fluid and he wouldn’t be able to live the life he wants with me. He told me that he very well understood my preferences and would still love me if I choose to live with him or not. When I questioned him about his reaction when my parents informed him, he told me that my parents never spoke to him about my gender preference and If he had known he would have let me make my decision. I was very thankful to my parents that they did not inform him because it felt much better to come out without my partner judging me.
