Being Gay in the Indian Military: Major J Suresh’s Story of Courage
What does it mean to be gay in one of India’s most disciplined, conservative institutions the armed forces? Retired Major J Suresh, an exam officer, answered that question with rare honesty when he came out publicly through his blog. His essay isn’t just a personal revelation; it’s a challenge to the systemic homophobia that silences queer personnel. His story opens up a vital conversation about dignity, honour, and the right of LGBTQ+ Indians to serve openly in the military.
Pride Meets Uniform
Queerness and the military have long been framed as incompatible, both in India and globally. For decades, gay soldiers risked expulsion, dishonourable discharge, or violence simply for existing. India’s armed forces still do not officially recognize or allow openly LGBTQ+ personnel, even after the 2018 reading down of Section 377.
Major J Suresh’s testimony breaks through this silence. By sharing his experience as a loyal officer who also happens to be gay, he exposes the hypocrisy in military leadership that values “honour” but denies queer soldiers’ dignity. His essay resonates deeply in today’s India, where Pride marches celebrate visibility, but systemic institutions remain untouched by inclusivity. His message is clear: being gay doesn’t undermine discipline or patriotism it strengthens the armed forces by affirming authenticity and human rights.
The Closet in Camouflage: Suresh’s Personal Journey
Like many queer kids, Suresh’s journey began with bullying. He recalls having a crush on a boy in school, only to be ridiculed by peers. That ridicule planted fear that his feelings were “wrong” or “sick.” To survive, he conformed.
Later, as he trained at the National Defence Academy and graduated from the Indian Military Academy, those suppressed feelings resurfaced. “By my mi twenties, I started understanding that I was gay,” he writes. But in the army, truth came with a cost: disclosure could mean a dishonourable discharge. So, he stayed silent, torn between loving the uniform and fearing rejection.
Family became his anchor. His mother, initially confused, eventually affirmed, “So what you’re still my son and I love you.” His father reassured him of unconditional support. Yet, reconciling his Ex-military identity with his queer self was a struggle he carried for years.
In his essay, Suresh dismantles outdated military arguments that equate queerness with weakness. He reminds senior officers that the same fears about “unit cohesion” and “morale “were once used against women and Dalits in the forces, and against Black soldiers in the U.S. Army. History proved those fears baseless. The only real measure of a soldier is competence, discipline, and teamwork not their sexuality.
Why the Military Needs Queer Inclusion
Major Suresh’s call to action is not just personalities systemic. For LGBTQ+ Indians, the military remains one of the last bastions of institutional discrimination. His essay urges leadership to move beyond prejudice:
- Dignity as a Right: LGBTQ+ personnel are citizens first, entitled to constitutional right seven in uniform.
- Breaking Myths: Sexuality has no impact on cohesion, morale, or professionalism.
- Global Precedents: Militaries in the U.S., UK, and Israel have successfully integrated queer personnel.
- Intersectional Justice: Inclusion must address barriers faced by queer people across caste, class, and region.
For queer youth aspiring to join the forces, visibility like Suresh’s is revolutionary. It plants the idea that they belong not despite their identity, but with it. And for India’s military, embracing inclusivity would mean aligning itself with constitutional values of equality and dignity.
Courage Beyond the Uniform
Major J Suresh’s story is more than a personal coming outfit’s a demand for systemic change. His courage dismantles the myth that queerness and soldiering cannot coexist. For LGBTQ+ Indians, it affirms that pride does not stop at the barracks gate. The fight for dignity in the military is far from over, but stories like his remind us that authenticity is the ultimate act of service not just to oneself, but to the nation.
Practical Takeaways
- Visibility matters: queer soldiers sharing their stories dismantle stigma.
- Constitutional values should guide military inclusion, not prejudice.
- Global models prove LGBTQ+ inclusion strengthens, not weakens, armed forces.
- Families play a vital role in supporting queer military personnel.
- Queer Indians aspiring to serve deserve safe, inclusive opportunities.
